


We're Married?!?!

by Anonymississippi



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex is on some good drugs, Based off of a YouTube video, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-28
Updated: 2016-06-28
Packaged: 2018-07-18 17:26:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7324168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymississippi/pseuds/Anonymississippi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex Danvers comes out of surgery completely dazed, holding onto a saltine cracker. She finally notices the most beautiful woman in the galaxy sitting beside her. Just because she's a little doped up doesn't mean Alex can't flirt excessively. Who knows? She might get a date out of the deal.</p>
<p>Or better yet, a wife.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We're Married?!?!

**Author's Note:**

> Based pretty much in its entirety off of this YouTube video:
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DiviQfLyQX4
> 
> The way his voice cracks is hysterical to me. Also, this is only rated T because Alex has a potty mouth with her inner monologue.

It’s too fucking bright and everything hurts.

_Everything_.

“…gotta getsum… water?”

“They’re bringing it for you soon.”

Her head, her fingertips, her pupils, her toenails, it all feels like soreness and pinches and salted wounds. And she’s _reclining._ Why isn’t she standing up and kicking ass if she’s _hurting_ so bad?

“Oww…”

She’s not even punching some alien’s stupid face.

Why the hell does it hurt. So. Freaking. Much?

“Ahh…oww!”

“Go on, eat the cracker.”

There’s something in her hand, a voice off to her left. Alex blinks, but her head feels worse than that one time she cross-faded in undergrad. Like a vice decided it didn’t like the shape of her brain and resolved to turn the grey matter into mush.

“gonna… gotta… sit up?”

“We’ll see if your doctors will raise you up when they come by.”

“What’s…”

“You’re just out of surgery, Alexandra,” the voice to her left says.

Alex had been rather preoccupied with her pain and the soggy square of a saltine she’d been waving about, but she’s finally able to shift her attention to—

“Woah,” Alex croaks, then blinks, just to make sure she’s not dreaming, because that’s the only place this woman sitting at her bedside might exist. In some amazing dreamscape Alex would only ever have the pleasure of visiting once in a lifetime. “Hey…” she manages, mechanically lifting the cracker to her lips. The salt is aggressive, a taste like a naval battle. Her jaw slacks and she worries if she’s drooling, because she is Alex Badass Danvers, and she will _not_ drool in front of the goddess of woman clad in the sexiest black suit she’s ever seen sitting right next to her.

Said goddess is currently filming her with a smart phone, which makes her wonder absently about hospital procedure; but Alex doesn't give two shits about procedure if it keeps this lady in the room with her.

“…the doctor send you?” Alex rasps.

“Yes, he said I could come in. You’re alright now, Alexandra.”

“’xandra?” Alex asks, scrunching her face up at the use of her full name. “—on my chart?” she asks, but apparently the sentence structures in her head aren’t connecting with what’s coming out of her mouth. The woman looks back at her with the smallest of smiles.

“Eat your cracker,” she says simply.

“You are… eye candy,” Alex says, punctuating her words with some emphatic cracker-waving. The woman raises an amused brow and smiles _again_. At least, Alex thinks it’s a smile… and maybe amusement. For some reason, she inherently knows how to read this woman’s every move, though revealing that while she still can’t recall the alphabet in its entirety might not increase her chances for a coffee date with the angel sporting the white highlight in her hair.

“The doctor send you? Are you m-my nurse?” Alex mumbles, smacking ineffectually at her cracker. “Cause you’re just… wow.”

The woman laughs. She _laughs_!!!

Alex made the angel _laugh_ , so she smirks around the crumbly bits of cracker that are stuck to the saliva coating her mouth. This ‘helpless’ thing must really be working for goddess/angel/dreamgirl.

“No, I’m not your nurse.”

“You’re a model,” Alex tries. “Your eyes are so green and you’re…like… really hot.”

“I’m certainly glad you think so.”

“Wassyur name?”

“Astra.”

“Astra,” Alex repeats, and its strikes something sure and deep within her, like mineral ore, like the roots of an ageless sycamore. “That’s not… sounds… pretty. Like astrolabe. D’ya like space? ‘Cause that’s how you see space, like—map… and you know where the stars go.”

“Eat your cracker, Alexandra. The doctors want you lucid before Kara and J’onn come in.”

“Kara…” Alex says, as Astra guides her weighted hand up toward her mouth. “Kara’s my…shh… she’s a sister—super… secret?”

“Go on, you need something light in your stomach; the anesthetic was quite powerful.”

“Astra, why are you… you wanna go get coffee?”

“Are _you_ going to take me to get coffee?” Astra asks mischievously.

“Nah, you hate coffee,” Alex answers, and she knows it with a surety, knows it in the same way she knows Astra’s name. “What—you don’t like coffee?”

“No, I do not.”

“Then why did I ask you that?”

“Because you are under the influence of some strong and entertaining drugs, Alexandra.”

“Why do you keep calling me ‘lexandra? I hate Alexandra.”

“I’ve always called you Alexandra. I’m your wife, you know.”

Alex coughs toasted bits of cracker up like a toddler. The hitch in her diaphragm shoots pain to every extremity, even the split ends of her hair. The remaining bits of food dribble down on her gross surgery gown, which is really killing Alex’s game.

Not that she needs game or suaveness or any degree of charm.

Because the most gorgeous woman in the universe happens to be her _wife_.

“Heeeheee,” Alex giggles.

_Giggles._

Alex Badass Danvers giggles in her hospital bed because Astra-who-dislikes-coffee-but-calls-her-Alexandra attached herself eternally to Alex in wedded bliss and all those legal bindings and holy crap on this saltine cracker…

_Does that mean she’s had sex with me?_

“Easy,” Astra soothes.

“You’re my wife?!” Alex finally voices, forgetting her pain, now purchasing her ticket to the Giddy Town of Unbelief in the state of Don’t Fuck This Up, Danvers. “We’re maaaaaarried?”

“So it would seem,” Astra answers her.

“Holy shit,” Alex smiles, dropping what’s left of the soggy cracker in the hospital bed. She slaps herself on the forehead and shuts her eyes behind her hand… but takes a peek through her fingers, just to be sure.

Yep.

Still hotter than Mercury.

“Oh my god,” Alex mutters to herself. “I hit the jackpot!”

“That does wonders for my ego, Alexandra, but you really should calm yourself.”

“How can I keep calm?” Alex fires back. “Have you ever looked in a mirror?”

“Come now, Alex,” Astra chastens her. “You really must—”

“How long?” Alex interrupts.

“How long…?”

“How long have we been married?”

“Oh,” Astra says, smoothing some of the hair out of Alex’s face. It’s probably greasy and tangled, but Alex can’t seem to care, because Astra’s _touching_ her. “A long time.”

“Daaaang. No way.”

“Very much ‘way’.”

“Have we kissed yet?” Alex asks woozily.

Astra’s still touching her head and she’s laughing and smiling and filming this whole thing.

“I really think you need to eat that cracker, Alexandra. I doubt they’d give it to you if it wasn’t good for your recovery.”

“But babe, babe, Astra, do we—wait, do we call each other ‘babe’?”

“You do call me that, occasionally,” Astra answers her, swiveling her head about in the white-washed room. She leans closer and lowers her voice: “Usually… at night.”

“What does—how did—you’re—” she’s got a million questions.

_How did we meet? What was the surgery for? Did J’onn walk me down the aisle? Why are you so pretty? What the_ hell _were you thinking marrying me? Is the saltine super necessary? Super… Is there something important in our lives that has to do with being super?_

“Do we have kids?” Alex blurts out.

“Not… not yet,” Astra answers, taking her fingers, putting another cracker in her hand. “Go on, eat up.”

Alex brings the cracker up to her mouth and attempts to concentrate on swallowing the bit that crumbles on her tongue. The taste of salt and incomprehension mingle in her mouth. She’s not really focused on the fact that she just had surgery, only that she got to wake up to _that._

“’S gotta be the most beautiful woman ‘ve ever seen,” she says to herself, munching obediently on her cracker, which is starting to taste better now. She turns to the side as she chews, trying to get a better glimpse of her wife’s ( _her wife’s!_ ) features. “Lemme see your face,” she says, batting ineffectually at the phone.

Astra moves the device to the side and can’t seem to stop smiling. Wow… Astra must love her _a whole lot_ if she keeps smiling and laughing like that.

“Woaaaaah,” Alex says, “Your teeth are perfect!”

When Astra stands over her, Alex nearly passes back out, but not because of drugs.

“Woah… turn around,” Alex says.

“What? No.”

“Come on, you’re…” like if an Olympic volleyball player decided to combine genes with Aphrodite, a ballerina, and a mythical siren. But that’s a lot of disparate categories for Alex to vocalize, so she just settles on the classic: “We’re maaaaaarried?” Her voice hitches to boy-undergoing-puberty-pitchiness.

“Yes,” Astra reassures her.

“Did I get you that ring?” Alex asks, because that’s the biggest ruby she’s ever seen in her life. “Dude, I musta been really liking you.”

“You must have,” Astra smiles.

“Can I kiss you?”

“No, you need to remain in this position until the doctors say otherwise. You can kiss me later.”

Ouch. That hurts worse than the whole-body agony that’s starting to wear off just a tad.

“But wha—please?” Alex asks. “We’re married! We can kiss anytime we want to!”

“Among other activities.”

“You can kiss me, you know.”

Alex finds the loophole! She can’t sit up but Astra can bend down! Astra must really like how smart she is, because Alex doesn’t feel very pretty at the moment.

“Will you promise to eat your cracker if I do so?” Astra asks.

“Yep,” Alex bobs her head in a very successful nod.

“Please don’t snap your feeble human neck,” Astra admonishes, tilting Alex’s chin backwards so that her head lands heavily on the pillow. Astra leans over Alex and the bright room goes dark, the woman’s black-suited chest blocking out most of the light while Alex blinks against her. She feels Astra kiss her forehead with those lovely, kissable lips, then retreat back to the small chair at her bedside.

“You didn’t kiss my mouth.”

“Because you’ve been expectorating all over yourself for the past ten minutes,” Astra says, taking a cloth and wiping against Alex’s chin. “Now, you promised to eat your cracker.”

Alex gobbles up what’s left of her cracker and smiles, yanks the cloth from Astra’s hand and swipes against her mouth.

“You are incorrigible, Agent Danvers,” Astra smirks at her, but leans over to peck her lips very quickly.

“So… you love me?” Alex asks, bright-eyed and not hurting at all anymore.

“Of course I love you, Alexandra.”

“Woah…that’s…well, I love you too!”

“That explains a lot,” Astra says, her face falling just a bit. “You did take a bullet for me.”

“I did?”

“Yes, and then you had to have surgery.”

“I… oh,” Alex says, staring down at her toes, flexing her ankles beneath the hospital sheets. “Was I really badass and impressive?”

“You were really reckless, and had me worried out of my mind,” Astra says, gripping Alex’s hand. It feels funny, because there’s this electronic clothespin thing attached to her finger that’s making it hard for her to hold her _wife’s_ hand.

“I’m sorry,” Alex mumbles, twitching her fingers in Astra’s grip.

“It’s okay.”

“I think I must love you very much,” Alex mumbles. “I would be sad if you got shot so… I’m sorry that happened.”

“It’s alright. That is… it’s not alright, but this little recovery period has been quite self-affirming from my perspective. And I suppose Kara will be very entertained.”

“Cool,” Alex says, content to stare up into Astra’s face, imagining all the awesome stuff they get up to as a married couple. “Astra?”

“Yes?”

“Can I have another cracker?”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!!!!!!! I have four other General Danvers WIPs just hanging out on my desktop in addition to the rest of the notes for BTL, but I wanted to throw this out there because of how stupidly gone I think Alex would be for Astra in this type of situation. She's a lovesick fool, that Alex Danvers (if you watch the video I swear this makes a lot more sense :P ). 
> 
> Also, a quick heads up to anyone interested in Benanti (Astra) and what she's been doing since Supergirl: on Thursday, BroadwayHD.com is livestreaming She Loves Me, the musical Laura Benanti stars in. I think it's ten dollars to watch it... but if you're like me and love musicals (but sadly have never had the chance to get to NYC) then it might be worth the money! I think it's supposed to be available for like a week after it goes live, in case Thursday's bad for other time zones!


End file.
